What’s your confidence streak? Does it ebb and flow, or is it always the same regardless of what’s happening externally? Is your confidence tied to what others believe or what you believe? Confidence is an issue for many people. Sometimes our awareness isn’t even attuned at a level where we are in touch with how we truly feel about ourselves subconsciously.
Confidence has to do with our faith in ourselves and in our the ability to do something. Self-esteem, on the other hand, has to do with how we feel about ourselves-our opinion. Self-esteem is impacted more by our ability to like ourselves regardless of what is going on in our lives. Confidence is about how capable we feel about being able to do something and be successful. A person who is self-confident can try new things easily and expects to perform well. He or she does not feel inherently lacking.
Frequently, confidence is not related to our actual ability, but out perceived ability. This means that we may actually be able to perform at an adequate level, but simply not feel we can due to the standards of others or our own unrealistic expectations. Sometimes we don’t feel like we are capable of certain things or can perform adequately. This may be in one area of our life or more areas. Even for people who typically are confident, situations and circumstances in life can erode confidence. Probably the most important thing to remember as you ponder on self-confidence is that it can be learned.
Even if you are not confident about certain things, you can begin to work on your confidence and improve it with the simple strategies I will suggest. These strategies are good for kids and adults. They also, when practiced consistently, will assist in improving your overall self esteem.
strategies for boosting confidence today!
- Learn to convert negative thoughts into positive ones. One of the keys ways we sabotage our confidence is through negative thinking. Catch yourself thinking in ways that are critical or unkind to yourself and abolish those thoughts.
- Understand that not having confidence is a learned behavior. You are not born faulty and so are not damaged because you may be lacking in confidence. You can overcome your lack of confidence by setting realistic goals, trying new things, celebrating your victories, and not judging yourself by external standards.
- Focus a lot more energy on acknowledging your positives and the things you do competently. This will help you muster the courage to confidently face all other things.
- Face your fears by doing feared things first. Get the tough things out of the way. When you do, you will more often than not find that you were able to do more than you thought. As you keep refining your efforts you will begin to feel more and more capable.
- When it comes to specific things you are being called upon to do, take baby steps as you build capacity. These baby steps serve as practicing opportunities and allow you to become proficient and more confident over time.
- Determine what is at the root of your lack of self-confidence. Is it related to just one area or multiple areas? When did these feelings originate and how long have you felt this way? Did they come from you or from someone else? What is the evidence for these feelings? Is it possible that there is a lack of evidence, or are there more reasons to feel confident than not to?
- Take a look at your self-esteem as a whole. Lack of confidence can be connected to how we feel about ourselves overall. Is your confidence related to how you feel about yourself independent of what you are or are not capable of?
- Make a list of all the things you do well. Review the list and take pride in the many things you do well.
- Note how you felt during your last major success. Relive that feeling and determine what you need to do to experience that feeling again.
- Think of something that you struggle with in terms of confidence. Set an intention to be mindful of your internal dialogue at all times as it relates to that thing. What can you begin to start doing to make yourself more competent in that area in terms of performance? Or, what can you do make yourself feel more confident in that area?
Tunisia Ali ©2017 Butterfly Transformations, Intuitive Life Coach, Reiki Master